Wednesday, April 30, 2014

What to do when your Flower Soft just isn't THAT into you!

I used to blame myself when my Flower Soft began to act inappropriately around me. It constantly called to me...saying naughty things, at first, then trying to lure me back into the dysfunctional relationship we had over the past year.

It wasn't overt at first, but then I heard it speaking in that calm and contrite way it always used to cozen me after our big blow-ups. Nothing earth-shattering...just things like "let's try again...just you and me. It'll work this time! I feel it! I KNOW I've hurt, betrayed the past. I gave you hope and happiness, only to flake away, piece by....(wtf ever it is I'm made of)....piece. I strayed all the time...I couldn't just be with you. Maybe it was the electricity in the air between me and everything else in your craft room, but I could see the pain on your face when you found me in the intimate places I practiced my debauchery. The computer keyboard, printer ink, A/C vents and all the rest. I knew the morning you found me lurking around your new eBosser, that we were through."

Of course, like any guilty party in a relationship that has imploded, it would work little jabs in here and there, hoping to make me doubt my own innocence in the break-up.

"I knew how special the eBosser was to you. You wanted it long before I ever came into the picture. I could see how you loved loved it in a way your could never love anything else...even me."

Naturally, I felt a little guilty. The Flower Soft WAS right....I DID love that eBosser! But it wasn't like that! The eBosser was a medical necessity! I have severe carpal tunnel in both hands! I needed that help, dammit! WAIT just a second....I'm innocent! How DARE it make me feel guilty??

"No, baby!" my Flower Soft was quick to back-off. "I didn't mean you were to blame! It was me! The truth?? You want the truth??? OF COURSE I wanted...more than work my way up into the trusting, mechanical heart of that (language edit) eBosser and force it to grind to a halt...NEVER to work again! I was jealous!!! I couldn't BEAR to see you so devoted to something besides me! Especially this Johnny Come Lately, who stays by your side, while I'm stuck in a Stamp-n-Storage 6 drawer unit (which is nice, don't get me wrong!) but I'm in the dark...away from you!!! So, yes! I tried to void that warranty on that (another language edit) eBosser by burning the motor out!! That's what I wanted!!!"

Blah, blah, blah....more apologies and remorse. But I stood firm.

For this piece, I admit to calling the Flower Soft and agreeing to see it one more time. I mean, we can still be friends, right? RIGHT???

I have to say that, while it did treat me horribly and scarred me for life over the past year by ruining project after project, it sure did work perfectly on this tag! I've never had it look or behave so beautifully! And hardly any blew off to terrorize my electronics!!!

What??? NO...HAHAHA...ABSOLUTELY NOT! We are NOT getting back together. At ALL. We are JUST friends!!!! I swear!!!!

But I can't help but wonder if we might could try the future, of course. Just maybe...but friends first. Just friends.

POST ADD MOMENT-I know I'm in for a good stretch when the old amphetamines are working so well that I can actually script an entire monologue about a failed relationship with Flower Soft. Folks, I don't know if it's genius or insanity, but at least the focus time was impressive, don't cha' think???

This is for SCS Teapot Tuesday! We've inherited our 'mansion' and are fixing it up. No mansion is complete without a mossy fountain and tangle of flowers, is it????


Stamp: Kaisercraft The Lake House
Tim Holtz Manilla Tags
Paper: Graphic 45 Botanical Tea "Birds of A Feather"
Black, Grey and Brown Copics
Vintage Photo Distress Ink
Memory Box Flower Die
Impression Obsession Flower Die
Black Burlap Ribbon
Mounting Tape
Silver Brad and Cross
and featuring...
the lying, cheating, cold dead beating, two-time, double-dealing, mean, mistreating...
Leaf Green Flower Soft

Monday, April 21, 2014

Freshly Made Sketches Challenge 132
I will call this "Rhapsody in Copper" (with big arm flourish, gazing nobly into the future, where my genius will imprinted upon all who gaze upon my art-like, at the Smithsonian or somewhere like that. Wait...that's not the place with all the art, is it? Sigh. Genius is hard.)


Soooooo.....once again, I sneak in just under the wire. You'd never know that I spend the majority of time on these sketches, I bet. Actually, I average 4 cards per FMS challenge. I send them to my friend SP, who says "Love it, Hate it (or) Wait until my Tylenol 3 kicks in...I've got to be on SOMETHING to stare at your creations for longer than 3 seconds."

You've got to love someone fearless enough to be honest!! :)

If you go back several posts, you can find the person to blame for my heated copper obsession. I ran some sheets through my Big Shot using my Tim Holtz Tattered Florals Die, then took the heat gun (along with my safety and well-being) into my over-caffeinated hands and BAM! We have my focal point!

Heated copper isn't difficult. It just takes a while for the copper to heat up and produce the colors above. But I think it's worth it, in the end. MAN, I love the look! You can also dry emboss it! It's a terrific addition to a card...ANY  card.

I used Mother Teresa's saying from SU! Inspired by nature and a sheet of actual cherry wood from Mixed Media 101. I took a piece of organza ribbon and a piece of jute and knotted it on the PTI Rustic Cream Cardstock.

Challenges entered:

Freshly Made Sketches #132

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Just Us GirlS Challenge #237
If there's a color combo I love, it's THIS one!!!

I've been stalking JUGS for awhile. 
Wait...there's no way I can make that sound right. Let's just be adults and move on. heh heh
I like the challenges there because they change weekly. That's a good thing because you have a good chance of being selected Chic of the Week because, chances are, you'll excel in at least ONE area! Unless you're me...then at least you have the opportunity to underwhelm in every area. HAH.
There's 4 days left so head on over...they're a great group of gals...very talented and funny. Funny ALWAYS ranks high with me. 
Entered into JUGS #237 Blue, Orange and Neutral
Recipe: Rubbernecker Stamps Morning Glory Frame
SU! Tempting Turquoise, Pumpkin Pie, Garden Green paper
SU! Tempting Turquoise ink
SU! Thatch EF and word die
Susan Tierney-Cockburn Dahlia Die
Wink of Stella Clear Marker
Gold foil paper

To CAS or not too CAS?

I received this gorgeous birthday card from Craft-t-bear (Christi) and it just blew me away!  

I decided I had to try that paper pleating...I loved it!! 

Anyway, her fold at the bottom was much better than mine. She didn't fold all the way across, which is a good thing because keeping it straight at the bottom is a PITA. I scored the paper at 3/4 inch all the way to the end. (I think I used 6 or 7 inch length and 3.5 wide). After doing that, I went back and scored next to each 3/4 mark at the next little line (the eighth mark). When you go to fold, it's almost like you pinch the fold. You'll see what I mean but if not, write me and I'll video if I have to. HAH! That'll be a NC-17 rated video...for language alone!!! 

Anyway, I cut the paper at an angle, stuck the prima flower at the top, tied the ribbon (thank the Lord for knots never going out of style...I'm the suckiest bow tie-er ever) and propped it and the sentiment up on mounting tape. That's is. Here's the deal...would this be considered a CAS card? 

I originally made it for a CAS challenge. I was on the fence, leaning toward 'no-not a CAS card'. A close friend seconded that. But while CAS, or any other genre, is subject to individual perception, I'm STILL confused as to what really makes a CAS card. I'm trying to develop an eye for it and while I'm taking the online classes, I've seen cards that are lauded as CAS when they're busier than a one-armed paper hanger! Don't get me wrong...I'm not remotely experienced enough to judge. I would love to ask for honest feedback from you. If it isn't CAS, what would make it CAS? Etc. I learn a lot from y'all and I learn more from people that trust me when I say that I have thick skin and you simply cannot offend me. Unless you call me a chubby b**ch....then I'll be like 'why'd you have to call me chubby???' HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Love you all!! PLEASE...leave your thoughts!!!!

Monday, April 14, 2014

Freshly Made Sketches Challenge #131

BOY!! Talk about getting this in by the skin of my teeth!!!

T minus 5-1/2 hours to get your entries in right HERE

If you don't make today's sketch, the new sketch will be out tomorrow. Even if you don't want to play, check out their DT. Talk about inspiring...those gals know how to rock a sketch like nobody's business!

I stamped the lily in Archival Ink, on Mixed Media paper. I colored the center, then used Flower Soft to add a little texture. Using Distress Inks, I watercolored it and then cut it into 3 pieces. I mounted each on black cardstock and placed over 3 Memory Box Tessatina Diecuts, with a few pieces left in for interest. 

I can't explain why I offset the middle piece of the lily. It just seemed like the right thing to do. One thing I've learned from FMS is that interest can be created by doing just little things. I can't say I make it work all the time, but since playing with FMS, I DO know that I need to trust myself and experiment when it feels right. 

Wish me luck!! Hopefully, it's my week to win, place or show! Come on over and play! Winning notwithstanding, I've learned more here from a comprehensive standpoint than any other blog. Check them out!!

Ink: Ranger Archival and Distress Inks. Victorian Velvet, Worn Lipstick, Spun Sugar
Paper: PTI Rustic White, SU! Certainly Celery
Stamps: SU! From the Garden
Impression Obsession Sentiment
Memory Box Tessatina Die
Citrus Ultra-Fine Flower Soft


Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Copper tidings, Insomnia and Mexicans

The first question that needs to be asked is WHY, in the name of all that is holy, am I making cards and posting them at 3:35 in the morning? My eyes hurt, my brain is fuzzy and I just want to sleep. Which I can't do.'s not insomnia. The reason is much more insidious than that. The reason I'm being pushed to the brink of sanity and my body is officially sleep starved, is due to only one reason: I was kicked out of bed by a chubby 7-1/2-year-old, who sleeps like the dead and somehow manages to double his actual weight when he sleeps...making it impossible to push him to the middle of the bed and make an attempt to claim a paltry 6 inches or so.
I know, I know...and you're absolutely right; I DON'T blame him. Liam is merely taking advantage of sleeping with us which, though unwanted, hasn't been dealt with in this home. So, Liam is innocent. Who SHOULD shoulder all the blame? 

That's right: His father.

You see, when Liam was born, I was 38. At that age, I was mostly too tired to even THINK of procreating...much less actually DOING it and have it result in adding to our family of 5. 

PAM: (pre-adderall moment)  It bears to mention that I am Caucasian (not just white...more like 'translucent') and my husband is 'Chicano'. That means he's 2nd generation American from a Spanish/Mexican set of grandparents. Needless to say, after our many years of marriage, we occasionally experience a bit of culture clash. For example, he's STILL mentioning how much he wished we could've had a couple more kids. He says it doesn't seem like home until you have 30 people in a 3 bedroom house. 

I don't take him seriously, though. My beloved husband is quite non-traditional in every other way. He's a Marine (inactive) and served in dual branches. While waiting to re-up in the Corps (he wanted to change his MOS to computers and had to wait for an opening...he was convinced they were the next big thing back in 1982 ;) he was accosted by an Army Recruiter who gave him his desired MOS, sent him to OCS and the Pentagon. He left years later as a 1st Lt. with a degree in Mainframe Software Architect. Rolling on down the list of non-traditional, my DH is an avid golfer (with a club championship under his belt. You GO, baby!!!) and a man who isn't afraid to critique his wife's crafts, help her when needed and be a competent handyman. All of this WHEN he's not on the links. 

The only real downside is that he's either working or on the golf course. This he does while I'm at home gardening and taking care of the yard. It would figure I'd marry the only man of Mexican descent who hates yard work. I can't seem to get anything right. Sigh.

Anyhoo...along came Liam, my high-functioning, Autistic, little mixed race bundle of love. 

And he's been stuck in our bed ever since.

Several times, I've TRIED to get that kid out, to no avail. It inadvertently ends with his little ham fist smacking me in the mouth or I'm awakened by him breathing heavily or coughing in my face. Sometimes, I think it's cute. MOST of the time, however, I consider asking my husband to move into Liam's room. Not because it would improve my sleep by freeing up an additional 6 inches or so, but because it would make me feel better to think he's stuck in a loft bed where Legos lay like snipers, ready to lodge themselves into places you'd rather them not, and in a room in which we always seem to find a new species of bug or weevil, every spring and summer. 

At the end of it all, I keep the complaining to a minimum and try to grab snatches of rest when I can. As so many have mentioned, it ends all too soon and I'll miss it. I truly believe that. So, while it can make me temporarily insane, I DO admit to many nights of lying in bed with my husband, Liam wedged firmly in-between, and with the bathroom light on but dimmed by the door we've left cracked, we watch him snoring away and talk about our joys, worries and hopes for our youngest one, and vow to work as hard as it takes to prepare him for an independent life as a man with Autism.

Of course, this discussion doesn't take place in whispers...we can pretty much carry on normal conversation as this kid can sleep through anything. Afterwards, we shut off the light and try to claim a few inches of bed space, as my little chunky monkey is stretched out the width of the bed and who is quick to our efforts of attempting to move him with a fist to the eye, or a foot to the solarplexus. 

All of which we consider some of the biggest blessings of all.


SU! Whisper White and Perfect Plum 
Perfect Plum Ink
Heat Gun
Sentiment "Let Your Soul" by DK Designs
Memory Box Poppy Die

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Freshly Made Sketches #130

Just in time for Freshly Made Sketches #130, here's my entry. This sketch was a tough one. The layout confounded me. But, I'd just purchased this stamp set and figured I'd give it a shot. I stamped the image and colored the skirt and shoes with pencils. I coated the shoes with glossy accents to give them a satin shine, then put a touch of the same glitter I used for her top. I layered it over Pink Pirouette and embossed mat. Three handmade roses and a sentiment from Carte Postale complete the sketch. You still have time to enter FMS130!

Stampin Up' En Pointe and Carte Postale
Stampin Up' Pink Pirouette, Whisper White
Memento Black Ink
Handmade roses in white and pink

Entered into
Freshly Made Sketches #130

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Impression Obsession Challenge-GREEN

This IO challenge is one I hadn't done in awhile and I'm not sure if the fact I chose to do this one will end up a good or bad thing.

I cut the frame but left the top attached. I painted the front with crackle paint, embossed a soft yellow mat, cut my Impression Obsession vase, hollyhocks and branches using white, pear pizzazz and garden green. I colored the hollyhocks with copics. The idea I had in mind was the little chotchkies that my grandmother always had sitting on little what-not shelves throughout her house. 

Thanks for the challenge, IO. Glad to be back!!