Blasts from the Past-December 2014 Cigar Box Clock

In September 2014, I was asked to be one of the Dirty Dozen Design Team Members at Splitcoast. We created 6 projects a month and served a 6 month term. A part of our agreement was that we would not publish any of our work until 6 months past our end date. Mine was up 6 months ago in October 2015. It's my pleasure to share with you some of my favorite entries over the next few months. Mostly because it makes this blog look busier than it is. Just sayin'...

I'm going to start by saying that yes...I'm a little worried.

You see, ever since I decided that 'Mixed Media is for Me', I've spent about 2 thousand dollars on bags of brass miscellany, a thousand on random collage papers and about 17 thousand on E600 glue. 

And no...that's not the problem. See, I took the whole "money has to be kept circulating if you want it to return to you" wisdom to heart, and have done my best to keep those suckers circulating as fast as possible. To be fair, they don't seem to circulate BACK as fast as I put them out, but I feel confident those back bills will catch up one day. I was assured of this by the financial gurus that provided me this wisdom years ago.

Jim and Tammy Faye Baker.

Anyway, I don't worry about the cash. Before art, I was spending like the devil was behind me and trying to snatch it out of my hands on home improvements. 

Art, my husband finds, may cost the same, but doesn't involve people messing with our wiring and knocking out his computing and golf watching activities. And, instead of big chunks of money being spent at once, this is more like a slow bleed of cash, which he finds more palatable.

But I digress.

What REALLY concerns me is the products I've been using in my mixed media obsession. Spray paint, E6000, resin, alcohol, primer paints and gasoline. 

Wait...strike the gasoline...it's only the kids who play around with that.

SO...what do all those things have in common? BESIDES the ability to make the most godforsaken, permanent messes on the planet??

Hold on...I can't believe that, as I typed that, I actually FORGOT WHAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO SAY WAS THE WORST THING ABOUT USING THOSE ITEMS! OH LORD...IT'S ALREADY HAPPENING!!! 

It's because of the vapors! Or drift! Or what the freak ever you call it! It's the stuff that can cause brain damage!!! 

***Note*** I DID consider the state of my mind before I began all this, to the state of my mind now. I'm loathe to admit this but, if anything, my memory is no worse, if not a bit better for the experience. Hmmmmm. HEY....what if it's against the law to abuse inhalants because they, in truth, give us superpowers and the government is terrified of that!?!?!?!?!?! 

***NOTE ON THE NOTE*** I have a feeling I just shot myself in the proverbial foot with that last sentence. Sigh. Must I ALWAYS be SOMEONE'S cautionary tale?????

I'm sharing all of this with you, because I take my responsibility as an artist (and by artist, I mean 'cautionary tale') very seriously and, on that note, will tell you this: wear a face mask. And, when reading the usage instructions, merely opening a window in your craft room does not count as a 'well-ventilated area'. It will STILL permeate your entire house and, as a result, your kids will forget their names for a couple of days, and you'll find your dog standing in the corner, thumping his head on the wall for hours. 

There. I feel I've done my...um...what's the word?

Oh yeah...'duty'. Not 'doodie'....hahahahahahaha...I'm such a card! So glad you could join me today....whoever you people may be. 

Alright, down to business. THIS is a cigar box. Once again, I owe huge thanks to the Laura Carson tutorials at artfullymusing.blogspot.com. I covered it both inside and out with G45 Couture paper. On the front, I drilled a hole in the middle, then set about decorating with brass and collage pieces. Quick note...I'm always doing things 'bass ackwards', as they say...if you do this, complete the INSIDE first. 

For the inside, more collage pieces that I fussy cut..the scene outside the window is attached using 4 layers of mounting tape for depth. I added tiny rose buds to cover the roses on her dress and used silver mirror paper in a small brass frame for a mirror. Using a brass column and a piece I colored black with copics to serve as a 'vase', I arranged more paper flowers. 

Back to the front...I took several head pins and glued tiny butterflies to them and I think it's one of my favorite embellishments I've ever made. I've found that if I don't edit the pics to size, people will be able to enlarge them if they like, so one inside and one outside pic isn't edited for size, so you can enlarge for detail if you like.

For the theme, blue is about as 'Calm, cool and collected' as you'll find on the color wheel. And I made the deadline! AND I'm starting to remember my name! Most of it, that is...but that's good enough for me! Mission Accomplished!

Mello Yello Lovin'

Well, looka here.

SOMEONE has been a busy bee!! 

If making a card and an ATC over the course of three days can constitute being 'busy', that is. 

This is the 3rd and final ATC for the Mello Yello theme at blissfulatcswap and now everything is packed and heading for Bev in the UK. I'm really curious to know if it'll get checked. Chances are, it will. Based on my facebook posts alone, I am a subversive, and potential anarchist.

But to be fair, those ARE my facebook posts. And, as we all know, neither facebook NOR pinterest translates to 'real life'. 

As much as I 'think' I can make the things I pin on my pinterest, and as much revolutionary talk that I do on facebook, the fact of the matter is that if we were REALLY going to accomplish something, we wouldn't be spending time talking about it or pinning it. We'd be DOING it.

The great thing about these sites, though, is that it allows us to believe we are actually accomplishing something. 

Of course, we're not, and we all know it. But it FEELS like I'm being productive when I share a news item, or pin a new recipe. I'm almost convinced I'm doing my part for humanity and the family. And I have to tell you, the older I get, the more easily I can convince myself that I have, in fact, made a difference. 

God bless the internet. If it weren't for that, I'd probably not even be capable of these totally imaginary positive changes I make every single day. The internet has given us the gift of delusion...and I think I can speak for all of us when I say "thank you."

Now to this ATC: 

Using alcohol inks which I dropped at random on paper coated with the blending solution, I came up with a psychedelic background. Using a great photo of Janis, a picture of the album 'Mellow Yellow' by Donovan, and various other 60's stuff (the ban the bomb and peace circles are coated with glossy accents to resemble 'buttons') I attached the woodstock at the top and decided to leave a nice amount of the paper uncovered. Mostly because I couldn't believe I actually tried a technique and accomplished it in ONE TRY. It was a miracle, people. A miracle, I tell you.

Now, it's headed out to the UK. As for me, I'm headed to bed.

Even a tireless, facebook revolutionary needs a break sometimes.

Impression Obsession Birthday Challenge

Let me begin by saying that I am DELIGHTED to be back into the Impression Obsession challenges. As most of you know, IO was the company from which I purchased my FIRST DIE! 

470 dies later, and I'm STILL going strong! 

Unfortunately for my husband, that number is less an exaggeration and more of a ballpark. Oh well.

I wanted to bring this up because it makes this next admission one that I simply cannot believe I have to make. Don't get me wrong....I make all sorts of mistakes and gaffes. Constantly. But rarely do I find myself in the predicament I found myself in the IO challenge.

You see, this challenge was titled "Birthday Wishes". And I knew EXACTLY what I was going to do.

I'd gotten this awesome wedding cake die from IO and have been DYING to use it. So, I cut the layers in pink patterned paper, cut the ropes in white, then added liquid applique to give it a puffy, 'icing' look. I altered the stand to make it shorter and hid the adjustment with the little bow that comes with the die. I used some paper roses and leaves from another IO die and was simply thrilled with the outcome.

But it was then I realized what I truly thought was something not EVEN possible. Not the with amount of things I've purchased from Impression Obsession. Can you guess what it is???

That's right! I own 75% of their dies and while I don't own as many stamps, I made sure to buy a few sheets of sentiments for each holiday. The one I missed? That's right. I didn't have the words Happy Birthday from IO ANYWHERE.

I don't believe it either. Suffice it to say the first thing I will purchase with any gift certificate I may win, is a Happy Birthday sentiment. Seriously...do you KNOW how much anxiety I suffered from? And I had to suffer silently! Because my husband certainly can't commiserate when I sob that I have no birthday sentiments to use on my IO challenge cards! 

To be fair, it really doesn't seem that terrible in print. But it was terrible. You'll have to trust me.

So, we're going to hope it looks enough like a birthday cake that the judges over there will just totally forget to look for a sentiment. Hopefully. Sigh.

There's still time to enter the challenge...go here and good luck.

I've got to do a little shopping. 

Card Recipe

Wedding Cake Die DIE243-W

Leaf Cluster Die DIE066-C

Spellbinders Frame

Mellow Yellow Groovin'

As you all know, I have very little patience for the 'norm'.

I always feel like I need to push past any traditional rules and stretch my creativity.

Which really just translates into I had no clue as to what to do and I stumbled on this little template and swore I'd make it work.

This little van is the size of an ATC..3.5 x 2.5.  Actually, it's a bit shy on the 2.5 side but let's not dwell on that. I went a little crazy with crystals and stickles, as you can see, but what a blast!

On each side of the van, I glued a Tim Holtz band, both with sayings about journeys. The van ties in with the Mellow Yellow theme because the song, by Donovan, was a huge hit in the 60's. It was speculated the song was about getting high on banana peels. Which sounds like the person who came up with that was high in order to invent something like that to begin with. But when you think about the 60's, hippies, vans, peace, love, rock n roll and all the different things rumored to get you stoned , works. And since I really can't do much with any of the aforementioned items (this IS going to the UK, mind you...I'd hate to start an international incident. Although, I DO feel like I'm on quite a few watch lists, somewhere...trust) I did think the van was a nice twist on the theme AND on the traditional ATC.

I hate that you can't see the tie-dye effect that's on the word bands. Using alcohol inks and 6 bright colors, I was able to make them perfectly tie-dyed. They're really cute. 

I really hate to do this to you guys, but I've got to make this a quick one! Family is flying in tomorrow and I've got to do some heavy-duty cleaning/sterilizing/burning before they get here. I also have to bite the bullet and color my hair, which is something I hate. I'd rather clean a horse's hoof with my tongue than brush out all these curls into an afro (that would fit right in with this theme!) and struggle with color that ends up all over my body, as much as on my hair. I always reach a point when I look in the mirror and, between the afro, subtle red skin coloring and chubby mid-section, I see I distinctly resemble an ancient fertility charm, or something to that effect.

I'm one away from completing this month's theme for BlissfulATCswap so I'll see you shortly!

Hopefully, sans gray hair, afro and red body tint. 

Hopefully.

Trauma, Tears, Tension and Titillation

<Deep breathing. In count of four, Out count of four>

Okay. First things first. Mermaid. The last of my three for the Mermaid theme for VPI. Alcohol ink background, G45 image and sentiment, brass findings, more ferro molding paste for sand and-thanks to Laura Carson at artfullymusing.blogspot.com I clipped small pieces off my juniper bush, sealed them with acrylic spray and used stickles and micro beads to turn them into sea weed/plants. Some encrusted jewel frantage and we're done.

I hate being so brief, but I am just vibrating with suppressed anxiety as I write this. In the past hour and a half, I've cried four times, almost hyperventilated twice and found myself committing SERIOUS adultery in my head. 

No count on that last one...I'm just going to say I never stopped.

And yes...the reason for ALL of this is because I JUST saw the first episode of Outlander. Season 2. (whimper)

If you haven't watched or read Outlander, I am sorry...how empty your life must be.

What's that? You don't believe me? Ok. Let me just make my point. This should sum up Outlander and why your life is much the emptier without it.

I was actually going to follow this up with a shirtless picture of Jaime Fraser, but the next thing I knew, I'd been looking at Sam Heughan in various stages of undress and realized that I was never going to get this post finished...or feed my kids....OR move forward with my life, unless I put a block on my OWN searches for this type of material.

I had to. The last time I went looking at Sam Heughan in various stages of deshabille, I ended up somehow losing two whole days. I started on Monday and the next thing I knew, it was Wednesday, and Sam's abs were burned into my retinas.

Not that I'm complaining, mind you.

For the sake of getting this post done, I'll stop looking for pictures to post here. Instead, I'm going to go watch the first episode of season 2 Outlander just one more time. You know, just to make sure I'm solid on the plot. Not for any other reason than to examine continuity and consider character integrity and....

oh, to heck with it. 

I'm going to mute it and just watch Jaime. In slo-mo.

See you in a month or so...

More Mermaids and a Birthday

Let me go ahead and get the self-serving part out of the way:

My birthday is April 16th. I will be 48. I would appreciate money or gift cards.  Don't worry about what gift card I would enjoy because any will do. If I don't like it, I'll sell it on cardcash.com. 

That is all. 

I've never been one of those girls who cared about their age. In fact, I've always been quite happy to tell it, because I've worked hard not to SHOW it. 

The same thing with my weight. I swore I'd never be one of those girls who professed to be 130 pounds when the scale read 40 lbs higher. By the same token, I swore to never be the chubby girl who would sit and say "I don't hardly eat ANYTHING!" or "I'm starved! I haven't eaten all day! I usually only eat once a day anyway!"

That totally drives me crazy. There's no way a chubby girl stays chubby by not eating. If she's not eating all day, then she's consuming at least 3k calories in one meal to maintain her figure. Bottom line: metabolism plays a huge part in our ability to gain or lose weight. My metabolism is virtually non-existent. But I'm chubby because I eat a lot of grilled cheese, ice cream and snack cakes. A little more honesty, people. Just a little.

Anyway, back to whatever it was I was rambling about. Oh...age. That's it. 

The main reason I managed to keep a decent complexion over the years was due to sheer coincidence. And that would be my chronic underexposure to sunlight. I'd love to say that I knew the dangers of UV damage and went out of my way to protect myself, etc. But the fact is, I had no clue about UV rays or sun-related aging, or any of the other dangers that make up the lifeblood of the billion dollar cosmetics industry. Nor would I have cared. There was one reason, and only one reason that I stayed out of the sun and preserved my skin.

 I was too chubby to wear a bathing suit, so I spent most of my time indoors reading. 

And yes...that's is absolutely the truth.

Besides, I'm not white...I'm translucent. The sun and I never quite got along. In fact, while I was in my 20's, I went through this stage where I really hoped there were such things as vampires, because I wanted desperately to be one. Why not? Thanks to Anne Rice's Lestat, vampires were hot, immortal and could lay down some serious vengeance when they wanted to. 

What's not to like???

Sorry. I can't believe I just told you that. But since I already went there, I might as well admit that I used to physically LONG to go to Hogwarts, when I discovered Harry Potter at 30. And I mean I LONGED to go. 

Side note: I saw this on pinterest: "That awkward moment when you turn 11 and don't get a letter from Hogwarts." My kids actually admitted to hoping that would happen and being a little disappointed when it didn't. I didn't have the heart to tell them that, even if it did, if I couldn't get into Hogwarts at 30, they certainly wouldn't be allowed to go without me, so it was a moot point either way.

Before this goes completely off the rails, let's get back to my birthday. Because THAT'S what's important, here, people.

I realize I should be a little more modest and act like the day isn't that big a deal. But the truth is, the entire MONTH of April is a time for celebration. For me. Mostly because I have managed to survive this long. That's all birthdays really become after 40, you know. 

Survival celebrations.

So, as I sit here and revel in my survival (and hopefully money and/or gift cards...see above), I figure it's a good time to move on to the 2nd most important part of this post.

The second of my Mermaid themed ATC's.

Once again, I decided to indulge in the abuse of polymer clay. That's really the only word for it. Since I clearly have no idea what I'm doing, I can't call it "working with clay"...no...it's actually taking some poor, innocent lump of clay and subjecting it to numerous trips through the pasta roller, while verbally abusing it, and its inability to read my mind, over several grueling days. This was the first time I tried what is called the "Skinner" method of creating a kind of gradient in clay color. Like this

(click here to be taken to website)

I achieved a muted gradient that was completely irrelevant by the time I slopped everything else on it. But the base, the red coral and the coral opposite, along with the seaweed is made from clay. The fish and seahorse are brass elements, and the mermaid is pieced together from collage images. Desperately needing some sparkle in my life, especially since I was all but banned from using glitter by the Y chromosome inhabitants of this house, I MIGHT have gone a little cray-cray with the glitter.

Side note dos: Ban on glitter notwithstanding, I have a hidden stash that could light up the entire city of Burlington, NC, if not including Greensboro and McLeansville. They can ban all they want...but they'll have to pry the glitter out of my cold, dead, glue-tacky hands.

I glued a shell with a glass pearl at the bottom and filled in with Ferro Special Effects Paste in Amber Gold. It looks like sand and I promise that you'd have an easier time convincing a superdelegate to vote for Sanders than scraping that stuff off your project.

heh heh.

I used gold liquid gilt around the edges and sealed it with acrylic spray. 

Now, I believe I've spent enough time on you people. I have another 22 days of celebrating my survival and I need to get to it. 

The danged ice cream and cake isn't going to eat itself.

Tim's Tags April

Ahhhhhhh......April.

This was a FUN Tim's Tags. I've never done the mosaic thing, and it really was incredibly easy...not to mention it's an AWESOME effect! 

The best part, other than the excuse to buy Tim's Distress Paper Mosaic kit, complete with grout, glue and glaze, is that you really CAN'T screw it up. It's foolproof. Seriously. Because if anyone can screw something up, it's me. As my grandpa would say, "You could mess up a two car funeral."

Of course, this was the same man who, in complimenting a specific food dish, would say "This is so good, that if'n I put in on the top of my head, my tongue would beat my brains out trying to git at it."

We're a very descriptive people down here in the South.

But back to the tag. Using a bunch of green distress paint, I inked the base tag. Then, using Tim's resist paper, I brayered it lightly with antique linen distress paint, dried it, then used various stains over it. When you dry it, the paint is an additional resist. For the mosaic piece, I had the bird in a cage die, so I cut off the stem on the bottom, used the grout, then glued the little pieces of vellum from another one of Tim's paper collections then glazed the top. I used a light coat of wilted violet on the group. Very light.

Heated copper strips became the roof, a dowel piece-colored with walnut stain-serves at the post. I used garland and flowers and moss to accent and, lastly, a word band that I changed to copper with alcohol inks and colored the words in white with Tim's new crayons.

Considering my abject failure last month, suffice it to say that I'm as happy as a pig in...umm..his #2 stuff. And while I don't want you to think I'm putting on more airs than an Episcopalian, it's so nice to sit down and have something come together, instead of a project that makes me feel like I'm trying to put socks on a rooster. Even if it means buying more craft supplies, which I need about as much as a tomcat needs a trousseau. In the end, it's nice to see something completed and done well. 

I tell you, if I were any happier, I'd drop my harp plumb through that cloud.

That's it for me...time to put out the fire and call in the dogs.

Night.